The Witching Hour

Have you heard about it yet-the infamous witching hour? Let's add this BIGGIE to the list of Nobody Told Me About THAT! I don't want you googling "baby crying for hours in the evening" while one is on your shoulder doing just that. So let's get this little doozy out in the open before your precious one comes home with you.

What is it? The Witching Hour is the name given to the evening fussiness and hours of crying phenomenon that many infants experience. The general definition of the witching hour is:

• A period of time during evening hours that your baby cries inconsolably and is unable to sleep for all his crying. 
• It is noted to generally begin around 2-3 weeks of age, 
• peak around 6-8 weeks of age, 
• and disappear by 3-4 months. 
• It is also most often noted to occur between the hours of 6pm-10pm. 
• It may happen every night, or less often. 
• It might start in the early weeks and last a few months, 
• or start later and last only a few weeks.
•  It may be just a couple hours each time or it may be several hours. 

I have heard that not all babies experience the witching hour. My Son, was very fussy off and on throughout the day. In hind sight we understand that he probably had some tummy issues due to my over-supply which was not diagnosed until he was about three months old. Because his discomfort was a factor in his very poor napping, he was typically very tired by around 7pm in the early weeks, and even earlier as the months passed. He would usually go to sleep in the evenings and wake only for feedings within the expected parameters. So I would say he did not experience the witching hour.

However, our daughter taught us all about it! Just as the definition suggests, right around 2.5 weeks old it began. She would wake from her last nap of the day around 4-5pm, and an hour later we would try to put her to bed for the night only to be met with resistance. As the minutes ticked away, trying to get her settled, she would become more and more exhausted and the fussing would turn to crying which would turn to screaming! My husband and I would put her in her swing, put our then 16 month old son to bed, and then get right back to the attempted soothing efforts.

This would go on until she finally fell asleep anywhere from 8-10pm. We found that once she fell asleep we needed to camp in the spot holding her for an hour before putting her into her crib. If we tried to transfer her sooner, she would wake instantly and the cycle would begin again.

Some things to bear in mind:

• As with all things baby, this too shall pass. Please keep a positive outlook and know this is only a short season of chaos.
• It is not your fault she is inconsolable. As long as you have tended to her every need, she is simply over tired and does not yet know how to deal with that feeling.
• His digestive system and his nervous system are still very immature. Many professionals (Moms, Midwives and Doctors) agree that these two things contribute greatly to this phenomenon. Only time will mature these systems and our job is to see him through it.
• If you are in the camp of being afraid to create sleep props for your little witching one, please rest assured that does NOT apply here. Do whatever it takes to get your baby and you through these periods. If that involves constant nursing, pacifier use, swing or bouncy seat, sleeping on you, or any other thing that others may frown upon, so be it! If it works, DO IT and feel good about it!
• This is one of the most common age groups (2 weeks-3 months) that Shaken Baby Syndrome happens. As in any age group, and at any time, IF YOU FEEL TOO FRUSTRATED to continue your soothing efforts, GENTLY place your Baby in a SAFE place such as her crib or playpen, and TAKE A BREAK. Call a friend, family member or hotline for support. NEVER SHAKE, OR HANDLE A BABY ROUGHLY, IN ANY WAY.

So what do I recommend? Develop a plan, make sure everyone who will be in contact with your baby knows the rules of your plan, and stick with it. After the first few days that our daughter began exhibiting the witching behavior, I realized something was going on. I quickly learned about the witching hour that so many babies experience, and felt relieved that her issues were typical. I took the suggestions I found from a trusted blog I follow and devised a plan to get us all through this rough patch.  

Here is what my plan entailed:

• Nursed when she awoke from last nap
• About 40 minutes later I began bedtime routine including another nursing
• If she did not fall asleep nursing, or seem relaxed enough to try placing in crib,
• I put her directly in her swing
• and allowed her to fuss and even cry for up to 10 minutes securely fastened in her swing
• if she fell asleep I would leave her in the swing to sleep as long as she wanted
• if the fussing/crying was not tapering off my husband or I would retrieve her from her swing and continue soothing efforts in her room by reswaddling, side laying, shooshing, swinging on our knees and holding a pacifier gently in her mouth. If she was still awake
• once we hit the hour past last nursing mark, I would nurse again...

Often by this point if my husband had her he would bring her to me in our bed and we would quietly watch TV and relax while she nursed again. If she STILL did not fall asleep I would hand her back to my husband and he would soothe a bit and mostly just hold her until she FINALLY fell asleep on his chest. Either way, once she fell asleep we learned to hold her for a good hour before transferring her to her crib. Otherwise, because she was SO overtired, she would wake abruptly and begin the crying again.

Many times, as 8 or 8:30pm rolled around, if she was still witching out I would just call it a night myself. Our Son was about 16 months old at the time and I was quite exhausted from caring for two under two. So I would take my beloved witch and lay down with her in her room. By then, she would always nurse to sleep.

Other times, after holding her the magic hour, one of us would place her into her crib and there she would stay until she was ready for another feeding. Thus, that night's witching hour was over and tomorrow would be a new day! My daughter's witching hour phenomenon lasted from about 2.5 weeks until about 8 weeks. It was not every night, roughly 4 nights per week. Around 8 weeks it became less and less often.



A word on laying down with your baby:

There are many opinions and beliefs on bed sharing with your baby. You can do your own research and decide what you feel is safe. Your doctor will 99 times out of 100 advise against it. If you decide that it is a practice you feel safe with, you may find that it gets you and your baby to the end of a witching episode sooner. Again, do your diligent research and decide for yourself! And if you should decide to try it, follow all recommendations on safe bed sharing/co-sleeping as well as follow your gut.

Sounds simple right? Just plan on hours of soothing rocking and nursing your baby until he finally falls asleep, and know that it is just a temporary difficult time for him, and he needs your comfort. If that is how you feel, and once you find yourself in the throws of it you still feel that way, then kudos to you! You are abounding with patience and grace and the terrible twos and threes will be no problem for you either!

However, if you are like myself and many other parents, you may find facing this every evening to be challenging. Lack of quality sleep from caring for other children, being up with your newborn at night, or stressful work schedules and situations often cause marked decrease in patience, inability to make sound decisions in the moment, increased irritability, and other problems. For the sake of your precious baby as well as your sanity, having a plan in place and adhering to it is key. When your baby begins to mature and grow out of this stage, you will have built trust and secured a bond by being prepared to gently guide him through  his witching hours!

Key Points:

• It is very common for babies to have inconsolable crying in the evening hours
• It is a developmental issue that will resolve itself usually by 3 months of age, so mark your calendar!
• Have a plan in place on how you will get through each episode
• If at all possible, enlist help for soothing your little one during this time
• Don't be afraid to use a swing or bouncer, extra feeding/nursing, pacifiers and other "sleep props"
• Be sure anyone helping with the baby knows to walk away if they get frustrated
• Remember your baby is not crying to annoy you. She is unable to deal with her discomforts on her own. If you feel you cannot soothe her to sleep without getting too frustrated, remember to gently lay her on her back in a safe place (crib or playpen) and take a break.

Upcoming Posts:

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